I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
