You're a womanizer and a bitch.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
