Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
My pussy is not your playground.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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