I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
