Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
