Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
