I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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