I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
