were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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