yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
It's like God shit irony all over that family
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
