I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
Randomize