Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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