The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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