He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
