I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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