Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
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