just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
