like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize