I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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