I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
