drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
