Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
