I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
