He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
