And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Listen, dont tell me about your day or that your mom is in town. Don't ask me to drive you to the airport or proofread your paper. Text me when and only when you have a boner. Oh and take your pants off and leave your front door unlocked because I'm coming over.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize