he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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