wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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