I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Randomize
