I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I have an empty apartment, Chinese food, and fresh batteries in my vibrator. There's nothing on this earth that could lure me out tonight.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
