mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
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