who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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