"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
May the power of my ass compel you!!
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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