redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize