I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
it hurts more in the daytime
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
The air taste purple.
Randomize
