Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
If you've ever wondered what a shitshow is, just watch me at the bar on a Friday. Or Tuesday. Take your pick.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize