break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
