I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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