Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize
