so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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