Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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