I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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