Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I've blown a few things in my day
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
