I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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