Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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