If i come over, it means nothing
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
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