a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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