So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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