he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
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