are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
