He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
Randomize
