OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Randomize
