ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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