you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize